Tag: grief

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Bad things happen to good people, however, in order to move forward, we need to re-channel our negative thoughts.

Photo by Karl Magnuson on Unsplash

Sometimes the road we’re on gets bumpy with roadblocks and potholes

As we travel along our journey, most will encounter rather rough times which can occur to ourselves, our family, our friends, or our colleagues. While we are not able to change the situation, we are able to control our reaction to the situation. With our thoughts, we can re-channel negatives into positives that are more beneficial to our mental and physical health in the long run.     

Grief is part of the healing process

When we have a loved one die from disease, taken by a sudden accident, or other unexpected trauma, naturally, we experience a great deal of grief. This is expected and is part of the healing process and getting past the terrible things that can happen to us throughout our life. However, we must not let our grief take control of our life, keep us under its control, and prevent us from living a full and productive life. 

We can accept what IS but we can’t change what WAS

Although we endure suffering and pain, we must accept what is since we cannot change what was.  Our inner resistance to the bad things that occur to us causes us more pain and we must realize that we cannot change the death of a loved one or the loss of a friend or colleague. Once we accept this fact, we can regain control of our thoughts, our feelings, and our life.

Accept grief for what it is and reject destructive coping activities

However, if we are unable to accept the grief that accompanies a tragic loss and bury our feelings in our subconscious mind, this can lead to a long list of coping mechanisms which are unhealthy and downright destructive. Being unable to cope, many have feelings of fear, anxiety and depression while others develop addictions to food, shopping, alcohol, and drugs. These choices are not good choices.  

Re-channel negative thoughts, words, and actions with positive thoughts, words, and actions

How do we then take a negative situation and put a positive spin on it? We need to re-channel our negative thoughts and actions into positive thoughts and actions. If we have a loved one die from cancer, in order to re-channel we can volunteer are at a nearby cancer center and help those who are suffering from this terrible disease.  

Forgive those who have done you wrong

Or having been betrayed by a loved one, in order to re-channel after the initial shock and disbelief, you can immediately forgive that person and see only good things happening to them in their present and future.

Regain what was lost times 10…you’ll be healthier and happier in mind, body and spirit

A close friend borrows a large sum of money and never repays it, in order to re-channel you can forgive your friend right away and then vow to regain that amount of money, plus another 25%, within 60 days.

Re-channeling creates growth of the inner you, your forever spirit

Re-channeling your negatives into positives helps you grow spiritually which then results in a happier and more fulfilled life. 

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Cassie (2008-2018)

Tribute to Cassandra (Cassie, Dec 7, 2018)

It’s so sad when a dearly loved pet passes. After all, they are family.

Today is that day; we lost our beautiful Cassie and my tears are flowing out of a place of such sadness as I write this post for her.

When my wife told me this terrible news, I frantically searched for her pictures; my Desktop and all the folders, various flash drives, and the archives of Facebook.

Fortunately, there were many that spanned over the decade she shared with our family.

Ah, to see how she grew from a little ball of fur to a majestic adult.

Cassie decided upon us as her new family

My wife and I visited a friend whose Persian just had a new litter a few weeks prior to our visit. Before us, a handful to choose from; all white kittens, some with blue eyes and others with brown.

Then there was the runt of the litter; a tiny thing, significantly smaller then her siblings. Perhaps, that’s what attracted us to her. Besides, she stuck out from the rest of the litter due to her coloring; white, grey, and ginger…a wonderful calico coat.

She was a multi-colored jewel in the freshly fallen snow.

And it was her demeanor…she sat quietly, patiently waiting for us to decide upon her. She knew we were her new family. She hooked us, and were all in…we’d be her new family.

When we brought her home, she was so small, the size of a remote.  

However, she had big feet and her paternal grandfather was a large cat. We suspected she’d grow to substantial proportions as well, and she did.

Sweet memories 

Between the tears, memories flood my mind about the numerous fun times we spent together over the years.

She thought she was a dog and enjoyed retrieving a ball; she liked kneading bare skin with those sharp claws of hers; and she enjoyed sitting like a regal princess in the warm morning sun.

When she ran around on our polished wood floors, our laughter broke the silence as she would often slide around out of control like a novice skater on ice.

And if she was stressed, she would go and eat; as a result, we affectionately called her ‘Piggie‘ since she would visit her food bowl many times a day. Still, she never became obese and we wondered why.

We needed to stay one step ahead of her because she was an intelligent feline. She learned how to push open our patio door, if unlocked, and escape into the garden. Prison break! With the door opened a crack, and no sign of our two cats, we knew that they, or rather, she, was at it again.

We’d search high and low amongst the bushes, and much to her disapproval, bring her back into the house. A good brushing followed since dried leaves loved to cling to her thick coat of fur.

Cassie and Muffy

They were terrors together! They’d run after each other as we slept, and in the morning our bedroom floor would be covered with fur from their playful frolicking in the darkness of the night.

Cassie, who was laid-back most of the time, surely wondered why Muffy acted as she did. High-strung and vocal and just nasty at times, Cass couldn’t understand or condone that type of behavior. She would sit quietly, regal looking while in the midst of drama.

However, there were many moments when they snuggled and licked each other’s heads as they showed their love for each other.

Do animals mourn?

Now, we just have Muffy left. I wonder if she feels a sense of loss with Cassie’s passing. They were together since they were kittens, that’s ten years sharing the same space, not missing a day spent together.

Does Muffy feel sadness as we do about Cassie’s passing?

My regret; I was there to bring you home as a kitten and wished I’d been there to comfort you as you moved on to your new home as an adult.

If there is a kitty heaven, then you just entered there this morning, and now you’re looking upon us in our grief and missing you so much.

 

Rest In Peace, our dear Cassie.